Namita Chandra, Prom Queen, Prom King


Ask anyone in the halls of CCHS what the highlight of prom 2017 was, and the immediate answer will be Namita Chandra. For the first time ever, our school partook in the tradition of crowning prom royalty. The winner was obvious.

Around 9:30, Mr. Mastrullo ascended the makeshift stage and tapped on the microphone, asking the frenzied mosh pits to subside. When the dance floor finally settled, the lights were dimmed and a hush fell over the crowd. A single envelope was handed to Mastrullo, and, as a roving spotlight scanned the crowd, a drumroll began. He ripped it open and read: “The Prom Queen for 2017 is . . . Namita Chandra!”

The crowd erupted in thunderous applause as the spotlight trained on Namita herself, who rose from her table and gave a wave to the crowd. Juniors and seniors parted the way to the stage as Namita glided gracefully forwards, smiling demurely. Remembering the moment, Namita says, “When my name was called I wasn’t truly surprised, because I know I’m the most beautiful girl in this school. I know a lot of times underdogs aren’t recognized here, so it felt nice to get the admiration I deserve even though I’m not an underdog.”

The football team assembled to assist Namita onto the stage, scrambling to give her a hand. As she arrived at the microphone, she waved to the crowd, reportedly causing several to faint on the spot. After a short and sweet acceptance speech, the tiara was placed on her head and the sash draped over her shoulders. Chandra stepped to the side as a second red envelope was handed to the principal. An expectant hush settled over the student body as they waited for the name to be announced.

Cracking open the seal of the next envelope and sliding out the card, Mastrullo read into the microphone: “And the 2017 Prom King is . . . my goodness . . . it’s ALSO Namita Chandra!” The students erupted in cheers and screams of joy. Several teachers broke into tears of happiness, as the dance floor applauded. Gasping with surprise, Chandra walked to center stage once again. Wiping a single tear from his eye, Principal Mastrullo placed the second crown onto Namita’s head himself. Then, double crowned and double sashed, she descended to the dance floor for the first dance. Twirling solo around the dance floor, her multiple crowns glittering in the light, Namita took everyone’s breath away. Long after the party buses left Boston, Namita’s victory remained on CCHS’s mind.

BREAKING NEWS: In a shocking turn of events, it appears that Chandra’s victory may have been forged. An intense investigation conducted by Officer Scott uncovered that hundreds of ballots with Namita’s name were written in handwriting eerily similar to her own writing. This scandalous voter fraud was quickly revealed to the school, but, alas, Namita had already fled. It is thought that the culprit is now at large in the streets of Concord or Carlisle. New updates to come soon. . .

SPOOF red Rubber Stamp over a white background.

SPOOF red Rubber Stamp over a white background.